2001-11-03 | 2:26 p.m.

corduroy licorice had a close call last week. his brother rang him up from the payphone around the corner from their house.

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i saw my most anticipated movie of the year, waking life. i liked it, but didn't love it. don't get me wrong, it was a really cool experiment and should be applauded, but it's tough to watch that style of squirrely animation for almost two hours, especially when you're listening to rapid-fire, monotone, glaringly scripted monologues for minutes on end. i had to close my eyes a couple times and still couldn't absorb the frenetic wall of information being pushed on me by too often bugged-eye speakers. also, there just weren't enough flights of fancy in the animation. only a couple of times did the animators push the possibilities (for instance, when two talking heads turn into cumulous clouds). that said, many times during the film i thought "cool!" at certain animation techniques and certain thoughts presented. it was good, but missed amazing by that much.

***

for those of you seeking quality hilarity in written form, do drop by to read the latest exploits of the detective.

***

recently i sent a birthday e-card to my much reviled, yet now somehow forgiven and pitied, ex desert storm. i've made the same gesture over the past few years just to be the decent sort. one year he just wrote back "thanks for the card. take good care of yourself." the next year he wrote back "thanks for remembering!!!" this year he wrote "how sweet of you to remember. how are you doing anyway?"

i wrote back and filled him in my life already in progress. i didn't mention my dating world since i figured that would just ruffle his tailfeathers. he responded with his update, minus any dating references. his note was unusually breezy and chipper and ended with "would you ever like to see me?"

i had to laugh. and laugh. and laugh. i could just hear him saying that phrase in a coy little flirty voice. what a difference three years makes. or has it been four?

my friend c-girl, who knows ds well, thinks that the 9/11 tragedy might have something to do with his friendlier policy. "you never know how that boy will process stuff." i heard that!

i responded to his query by saying that it would be fun to hang out sometime. "sometime." i have definite mixed feelings. although he and i have smoked the peace pipe and have had some pleasant conversations at a couple of his band's gigs, i haven't had to spend QT with the guy. he's a hoot, but often uses his powers for evil.

i've mused in the last couple of days on what he might have up his sleeve. "he wants to get back together." "he wants to be the first to tell me he's getting married." "he wants to introduce me to a more fulfilling life through the empowering phenomenon of herbalife products."

the first take on it is quite the ex-fantasy. he realizes that i was the best thing in his life. best relationship. best everything. how could he let that kind of wonderful goddess slip out of his hands? now that he is older, wiser and more mature, he is ready to be the man he could never be before.

that's a larf. a leopard don't change his spots. i once accidently came across some notes he had written in an informal sort of diary. that i read through them was no accident. i was trying to get a clue into the psyche of this enigma i was sleeping over with. he had scrawled, "sometimes i feel like i have so much to give to a woman, but it's never when you're around."

the funny thing is, over the millions of moments i've reflected on that relationship, i've come to realize that the good times with him represent what i'd like in an ideal relationship. lots of laughing and quiet moments. sharing odd movies. walking and talking. great chemistry.

of course, the shitty moments with him were ridiculously hideous. i cannot abide by that kinda caca anymore.

and if anyone is full of shit, it's him.

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