2000-08-23 | 11:35:35

it's on the great unwashed's lips everywhere you go..."survivor" finale tonight!

i haven't seen a bit of the tv phenomenon. i have been avoiding it on purpose. one guy at work will bring in tapes of it for lunchtime viewing, but i have managed to stay away in droves.

the concept of the show annoys me. it seems so contrived. lord of the flies, televised. spoon-fed human drama in short pants. bleh.

pish. stupid fucking people eating stupid grub worms.

i know, i know. but what about the unscripted emotion of homo sapiens in the wild? the lessons in cut-throat human behavior served weekly? i work in corporate america. i see that shit every day! it's apalling and ridiculous. i don't want to witness its regurgitation in a gimmicky tv show.

the first year of the "real world" is all i need in this lifetime when it comes to reality-based television. eric and julie had such great chemistry, didn't they? what a cute couple. i wonder what she's up to now...probably a dental hygienist in boca raton.

anyway. so i'm going to a "survivor finale!" party tonight hosted by the lunch-tape-bringer. what, you ask? am i selling-out? compromising my anti-survivor sentiments under peer pressure? falling into behavorial stereotypes as we speak?

nope. i just want to go to a party. i'm gonna push for one person to be voted out of the soiree at every commercial break. i'm voting myself out first.

you know, they should combine the two powerhouses of current tv, "survivor" and "who wants to be a millionaire?" both shows have a million dollars as the final goal. (i think dr. evil must have been the promotions manager for each.) but yes, combine the shows! island members could call their lifelines to find out how to deal with the tropic politics. regis could ask, "is that your final grub worm?"

i'm onto something here. don't kid yourself.

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