2001-01-11 | 23:27:22

hi.

i think that girl at work is stilled pissed at me about not getting invited to that birthday dinner thingee.

and i keep trying to talk to her to smooth things over, but she's been on the phone, or her door is closed, etc., etc.

closure will have to wait until tomorrow, i reckon.

i hate it when people get mad at me. it doesn't happen too much and i try to keep it that way!

that's what part of this nice stuff is about!

i want people to like me! and think i'm cool and sweet!

not to be pissed at me!

i had a couple of boyfriends in the past who would get pissed really easily. i remembering tip-toeing around them sometimes or trying to anticipate what would set them off so that i could avoid that.

"i bet this is going to make him mad..." i'd think to myself. i'd sweat about it. nerve endings dancing.

this girl and her reaction are causing the same bad tingly nervousness that those ex-boyfriends did when they got mad.

as my sister's three-year-old babysitting charge says, "i can't like it."

anger is scary.

anger is uncomfortable.

i mean, i know it's necessary sometimes.

a part of humanity.

and PIL says it's an energy and all.

well, if anger is an energy, i'd like to request rolling power brown-outs on a regular basis, please.

***

ain't no anger at girlboy, though. today is ansy's turn for girlboy talk...

<----������� ---->