2000-09-18 | 03:38:44

heh. heh. heh. heeeeeeeeeee.

i kissed a boy.

hee.

color me content. it don't take much, do it?

just a banana popsicle, "when harry met sally" in the vcr for the 40th time, sweet incense burning and a blank diaryland page. oh, and boy kissing. that's the topper, man. the topper. to the moon!

speaking of moons, it's been a few since i kissed a fellar, although i had an impeccable lip-pursing streak back in the spring. (ed. note: actually the pecking order is off in that entry on the last two kisses, as you will now see.) the official last kiss was just a requisite half-second smackeroo at the end of a great impromptu non-date. sweet, neat, petite, but could be beat. and was, baby, baby, and was.

the kiss that preceded the above-mentioned besame-ing was the last real, emotion-packing, satisfacting kiss. calendar pages fly off to april, 2000. the scene: an impromptu stayover at my former crush boy's place due to massive sour apple martini consumption. the end of the evening found us entwined in two pairs of his boxers. it was just some heavy petting zoo action. third base was not reached. i had my reasons to call him "out" at second.

you see, i had nursed a crush on this fellar for nigh on a year. after he let me know he was only in it for witty e-mail exchanges and drinks every three months, i cooled my jets. i settled into the friendship mode fairly easily. if you don't believe me, here's proof: the last time we hung out, i hadn't shaved my legs. imagine my embarassment when i found we were to partially disrobe at the end of the evening. that came out of nowhere. doh! but, don't get me wrong, leg stubble or not, i was pleasantly surprised by the encounter. he was, too. it was a really sweet culmination of months of wordplay foreplay.

the next day, it crossed my mind that he might be ready for us to see each other on a more frequent basis, but then that thought kept right on driving down the reality parkway onto give-up-why-don't-you-he'll-never-change avenue.

i took it in stride. i've had lots of practice with this commitment-phobe.

so, anyway, former crush boy has a cute guy friend who i've always thought was an untapped market. handsome, smart, funny, sexy, single, said to be super-nice. a friend of mine recently broke up with her three-year boyfriend and asked me if i knew of any guys she could hang with. i thought of cute guy. i sense a need for nicknames. well, former crush boy and cute guy will do.

i asked crush boy the dating status of cute guy. the verdict? available, but suffering from a.d.d. (attention-deficit dating). cute girl (my friend) says, "that's fine. i have a.d.d. right now, too. i just want to go out and have fun and meet cool people."

so we set it up. we'd meet for drinks. the four of us. a blind date was suggested, but cute girl wanted back-up.

so it all went down last night. the bar was hip-ish and pumping with live bluesy music, so the four of us paired into two "cones of silence." a conversation across the table was aurally impossible. so cute guy and girl are chatting it up. looks like things are cooking from my angle. she leans over at one point and gives me props for picking out such a studly young man for her entertainment. just call me heidi fleiss. big pimpin' in the l.a.c.

so me and former-crush boy settle into our comedy routine. trading put-downs and threats of bodily harm. a couple cosmopolitans later, i was feeling no pain. at one point, i realized that me and fcb were holding hands. it was so nice. he has good hands to hold. feels so comfortable and effortless and non-clammy.

cute guy and girl are now kissing. the waitress brings round after round of ice water to dilute all the martinis each of us has managed to suck down. time to go home. time to argue about who is fit to drive. we walk outside discussing cab rides and who will drop who off where.

so anyway, me and fcb have this thing where we exchange CDs each time we meet. so he and i leave c & c music factory alone on a bench outside the club while we go to do our exchange. fcb and cute guy had cleverly separated our girly tag team. those boys. but i can't complain. nope.

so me and fcb are walking down the block hiptohip. we are both buzzed. he more than me. he tells me i shouldn't be driving. i know i am five minutes away from being ok. i accuse him of projecting. he takes a drag on a bummed menthol cigarette, insisting that he never smokes unless he's had a lot to drink.

we get to his car. he shows me the fine array of CDs he has selected in our unofficial columbia house exchange. he assures me that he has given the chosen CDs a lot of thought. i look up at him through the haze of his mentholated smoke exhaust as it whiskers its way through the buzzing fluorescence of the streetlight. his eyes are looking down at me, narrowed.

so i kissed him.

yeeeeeeeeeeeah, boy. he kissed back. a lot. heh haw. yep. after a couple minutes, we pulled apart and he said it was time to go to my car for his music takeaway.

he slipped his hand onto my hip as we manuevered through the parking lot to my 1996 automobile of the year. we kissed before opening the door, i gave him his cds and then we kissed some more.

there is something to be said for kissing a friend who you are attracted to. it is much more enjoyable than kissing a stranger (sorry, fernando) or someone even relatively new who you're dating.

why, i just pretended you asked? there are the shared backstories, the long-term appreciating, the inside jokes, the unanswered questions. this kind of friend kiss is the snickers of kisses. it really satisfies. as opposed to being packed with peanuts.

so mid-kiss, his cell phone rings. it's cute guy wondering what's taking so long. fcb fibs that we had to walk blocks to my car. heh. we turn around and there they are, watching us from across the street. doh!

so we all said our goodbyes. fcb saved me for last, kissing my hand as he left. oh yes, he has a bit of the errol flynn about him.

so all day sunday i enjoyed the afterglow of kissing a boy. i could ride this kiss buzz all week. actually, i'd better stretch it out since it's gonna be three months until i get to suck face with fcb again. um. yeah. heh.

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