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2003-08-17 | 11:42 p.m.

corduroy licorice was excited about scoring pit tickets to a marilyn manson concert. the show was going great until marilyn started heaving steer manure into the crowd. when the shit hit the fan next to him, corduroy decided it was time to head home.


my forklift dodging neighbor was outside smoking when i got home from my evening jog. this was to be our first encounter since i left him a note accusing his morning alarm clock of being loud enough to summon the hounds of hell.

"nictate," he began, "i wanted to talk to you. i got your note, but that wasn't my alarm clock. i heard something, too, but it wasn't my clock. i've had the same clock for years and it doesn't have a volume control on it, so even if it was my clock there is nothing i could do about it. i was going to tell you sooner, but i'm not a note kinda guy."

not a note kinda guy.

too macho to put pen to paper, i'm assuming. anyone who plays toreador to a two-pronged rolling machine of possible maiming is not going to take time out to scribble a missive in the name of neighborliness. would charles bronson write a note? i don't think so. nuh-uh. bics are for babies. notepads are for ninnies. handwritten communication is for men without hard drives.


movie review:

my friend d-girl took me to see the latest johnny depp cinematic hit. ok, the only johnny depp cinematic hit. i really enjoyed pirates of the caribbean. of course, jd is the jewel in this buried treasure. his keith richards-inspired, dreadlocked pirate is fey and fabulous. shiver me timbers!

recently i was wondering to myself which actor had stood the test of time in my all-time crush files. nicolas cage used to hold that honor, but after con air i really couldn't hold him in the same regard. johnny, though. johnny has stayed true to odd. even though this is a big hollywood hit, he does it his way and it works. big time.

orlando bloom is a delightful sidekick, too. he's skinnier than kate moss, but he has a bit of the errol flynn in him.

i know this will probably offend many, but i think pirates of the caribbean is a better film than the lord of the rings. to turn the elvis song around, it has a little less action and a little more conversation.

i've only seen the first the lord of the rings movie, but it was so awash in action and frodo's gaping reaction shots, there wasn't much room for character development. especially disappointing since i devored the dense-with-delight j.r.r. tolkien books in my youthfuller years.

even though pirates is still light in this department, there was enough back story and acting talent to make me care about orlando and johnny's characters. geoffrey rush did an excellent job as a cursed pirate, too.

the writers peppered the script with lots of smart and playful lingo and little comedy winks throughout the film, something that i always appreciate. it gives the audience a little credit, thank you very much.

in summary, it's a bit of yohoyoho summer fun that doesn't leave the plot and characters marooned in flashy action muck.


music tip:

i've been listening to a cd in frequent rotation on my boombastic boxtastic lately: saturday sounds good to me.

first off, good band name. i read about them in giant robot magazine. for the past several months, whenever i hear or read "'60s-inspired pop" in relation to a new band or cd i'm so there.

when i first played their album called "all your summer songs," i thought "uh-oh. this sounds pretty awful. like someone recorded it in their kitchen. and, um, it's kinda sorta off-key sometimes--when it's not lilting and lovely, i mean."

i didn't want to give up so easily. a few more play button pushings and i was won over. now i see that its charm lies within the things that sound like flaws. its tinker-toy-nish-ness is sweet and comforting. deceptively simple and immensely likeable.

my favorite tune is "all our summer songs." it has a cascading waterfall plink to it that always draws my eyes to the LED track number readout. "what is that? it's goooood."

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