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2002-02-20 | 7:31 p.m.

corduroy licorice liked to bum rides on the gravy train. obviously, the town he lived in sure was big on mashed potato toppings to warrant that kind of tanker-loaded demand.

***

a friend e-mailed me a link to a site that does a color-coded test of your emotional state. you pick your favorite colors (in descending order) from the shades they display and then they pop out an analysis of you. here was my test result:

"you are longing for some love and affection at this time ... not that you have been deprived of tender loving care ... but there are times when everyone needs to try something new or to go 'somewhere' else to perhaps experience that little extra 'understanding' ... "

ahem. i don't have to read between the ellipses to get what they're suggesting. and if there's one thing i'm not resorting to at this time in my life it's a whorehouse. mon dieu! what could they have been thinking?!

***

found on random post-its i jotted down i-don't-know-when:

"i wish i could swallow you like a piece of gum so you'd stick around for seven years."

"i may be even worse at this dating thing than i thought, but don't worry about me. one day i'll overcome...like a phoenix rising from the asses."

speaking of asses, i also have an idea for a game show called "you think you're anal."

***

i usually prefer expressing laughter in type form by writing "ha!" vs. the more common "LOL," but LOL does fit the reaction i had when i read this:

"i hate dave eggers because he stole my writing voice before i even had a writing voice."
- andy pressman of ohmessylife.com

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take a peek at these - (c) 2000-2003 nictate:

health tip
2005-03-16

health tip
2005-03-16

moving house
2004-11-19

quibbling with quitherfeather
2004-11-17

catcher in the wry
2004-11-16