2001-12-10 | 6:40 p.m.

corduroy licorice drove his brother up a wall. no one had ever left treadmarks up the side of the a&p before.

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all the '80s songs pegged for using euphemisms for masturbation in their titles/lyrics that i could think of in a 5-minute period:

- she-bop by cindy lauper

- turning japanese by the vapors

- dancing with myself by billy idol

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i got a new haircut and new hair color! it's fun to play with hair! wheeeeeee!

imagine if you will an anim� imp. then mix in a bit of a bob and a dash of cruella deville color patterning (but in shades of red vs. b&w). the good thing about this cut is that it has various vamp settings...depending on how many head of mousse are in my herd, i can go from innocent office girl to lead singer of a grrrl band in 10 seconds flat. i really couldn't ask more of a haircut. to do so would be the height of cheekiness. the height!

***

speaking of hair, the man who wasn't there was a brilliant film. billy bob threw down on the acting tip, frances mcdormand ruled as per usual, tony shaloub was excellent, the black and white imagery was gorgeous, the script was razor sharp and the droll coen brothers' humor was in full effect. oscar-worthy? my, yes. nictate award-worthy? damn straight, off-the-hook.

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