2001-04-24 | 1:12 a.m.

corduroy licorice never showed his hand. that's why his pants always had to have pockets.

***

so i was talking to a co-worker today. i had stopped by his cubicle to talk about a project. before i could launch into work talk, he leaned back in his chair and said, "nictate, so what's it all about anyway?"

"you mean the meaning of life?" i replied.

"yes."

"ah, well, i was just thinking about that this morning and i've come to a conclusion."

"which was...?"

"that living for ourselves is not enough motivation. there has to be something/someone outside ourselves to keep us going."

he then launched into a tangent about how most people live selfishly, which reminded me of a friends episode where joey and phoebe were arguing about if there is any such thing as an unselfish act. so my co-worker looked a bit disappointed that i had brought prime-time tv wisdom into the conversation.

i tend to bring pop culture references into most conversations. which is one of the reasons that it's good i'm not a supreme court justice. ("you know, this class action lawsuit against the abc pyramid scheme company reminds me of a simpsons episode where homer was suckered in by a 'trapezoid' scheme. heheh. oh, that homer. what was that sandra? stay on-point? oh, sorry that.")

anyhow. we continued our discussion about how most cultures have a "higher being" in their cultural belief system. so my co-worker says his dad is going to a seminar where they are going to discuss recent scientific research which indicates that that kind of belief is a programmed biological response.

"wow! that's cool," i said.

"yeah, but that means that people's belief in god is based on some random biological impulse."

"like urination."

"yes," he answered, exquisitely deadpan. "it's exactly like pee."

***

i watched the movie wilde this weekend and was sorely disappointed. wild about it, i wasn't. i thought the actor playing oscar wilde didn't bring much life to such a seemingly lively man. in the love scenes, he went the deer-in-the-headlights route.

i think the rave reviews it got were a reaction to its message about how some people have been cruelly punished for their sexuality. i agree that's an important story to tell, but i didn't enjoy this telling of it. it seemed like a paint-by-number biographical film that'd be shown in sixth grade classrooms. (of course, without the sodomy references in the script.)

one quote from the film that made me laugh relates to religion. wilde was discussing organized religion with a dinner companion and said that he couldn't believe in anything unless it was incredible. he described the catholic church's traditions as being delightfully mysterious, and then offered: "i would like to die a catholic, although i most certainly could never live as one."

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