2001-04-02 | 6:45 p.m.

corduroy licorice was always waiting for the other shoe to drop. it had been hanging from the power lines next to his house ever since his bratty brother ricky tossed it up there the summer of his senior year.

ricky licorice. heh.

***

i've never done drugs in my life.

seriously.

i have absolutely no desire to either. no desire to trip. no desire to speed. no desire to smoke out.

ok, i admit, a lot of this has to do with me being a control freak. i don't like the idea of being out of control under any circumstances...although i have been buzzed, loopy and even drunk on alcohol at points. never throwing-up-drunk, but hangover drunk, yes. i've even driven when i probably shouldn't have. lame ass me.

so why the late blooming when it comes to being under the influence?

i had a sheltered childhood and teenagehood and young adulthood, mostly because of a religious upbringing. i started sipping my boyfriend's wine when i was in my late 20's and didn't really drink with any kind of social regularity until the last couple of years. no college benders. no lost weekends.

and no drugs. i haven't even puffed a single cigarette. and i don't want to. (hey, if smoking is so great, why is everyone trying to quit? heh.)

tonight we had a work happy hour. our big boss wanted to take us out to thank us for the crazy work overload we've been dealing with of late. pretty cool, aye? at a couple different points, the topic turned to drugs. people told stories about taking cocaine, pot and e. i listened to their tales. heard about their good times and bad times with the stuff, but didn't feel a yearning.

honestly, i think drugs are stupid. i think drugs are a waste of money. i think drugs destroy people's lives. call me L7 if you will. say i'm missing out on cool-sexy-e-touching or mellow-pot-bliss.

homie don't smoke, swallow, snort or shoot that.

i know it's a blissful, often harmless, escape for some, but hey...when you come back down you've still got the same shit going on. and it probably will seem even shittier by comparison to the high. and i've been told enough stories about bad trips to wonder why people keep throwing the pharmaceutical dice and go back for more.

i heard on mtv (heh. at least it wasn't leno.) that once you get pass 20 hits of e, detectable brain damage occurs. another friend of mine told me about her friend who now has problems with paranoia, panic attacks and can't really hold a job from past drug use. yeah, yeah, yeah. i'm starting to sound like a diaryland version of reefer madness exaggeration and propaganda.

ironically enough, a number of my friends use drugs...most of them casually. i don't judge them or think poorly of them. they seem to enjoy it in moderation. i'd just rather not be around when they do. they seem to know that, too. hey, they can make their own choices and have their own brand of fun. to each his own. as long as they keep themselves and other people safe.

ok, so i've got to return this soapbox to barbra streisand. thanks for letting me vent! you're like buttah!

***

wink of the day:

"only the good girls keep journals. the bad girls don't have time."
-tallulah bankhead

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