2001-01-23 | 05:11:13

shit howdy.

i went for a hike on sunday and saw an eagle. it was cool and shit. i saw it swoop down onto a tree branch and its wing span kinda took my breath away. so he and i eyed each other for awhile. i stopped my progress in hopes of seeing him fly again, but he won the staredown, so i hiked on.

that night i went to my improv class. we were all walking to our cars to go home about 10:30 and as i started to cross the street, i tripped on this lip in the asphalt and started to fall in what was apparently slow motion by my perception of the event.

as i began to take the role of the rubber that proverbially hits the road, i thought to myself, "i can't fall in the middle of this busy thoroughfare in front of my classmates. i just ca-." bam. a belly flop on pico boulevard. my purse launched out of my hands and my make-up bag launched out of my purse. i was spread-eagle among my scattered belongings, so to speak.

the good news is that no cars were coming right then. two of the girls in class kinda laughed nervously and asked me if i was ok. i was. well, not exactly. first, i was totally embarassed. second, it hurt! my hands and knees were skinned. that's the closest i'll get to knowing what it is to be a skater punk. plus, i was kinda shaken up. i got in my car and tried to nurse my ego and my adrenaline rush.

so that happened.

then monday a.m., i go to get into my car to go to work and this neighbor from the building next door who introduced himself as lee asks me if i know who owns the car that's in the way of the tree trimmers and not to worry, they'd be putting up safety lights in the space between our buildings soon, etc., etc.

so he finally walks away and as i stoop to get into the driver's seat, i hear a "plop" and feel a seeping wetness on the crown of my bent head. SHIT! literally. an "eagle" had spread its mess upon me, so to speak.

a bird had taken a dump upon my skull. i was already late to work. chatty lee had made me even later...plus had put me right in the path of the incontinent fowl.

as i went back inside to clean my head as best i could, i thought about how if lee hadn't crossed my path, i would have been on my way to work when the shit hit the fan, so to speak, and i would have had a dry head and a damp driveway. it reminded me of the opening of the movie "magnolia"...how random coincidences can have amazing reverberations. like getting crapped on from on-high and such by falling frogs or feathered friend effluence or what not.

my friend katty tells me it's good luck to have a bird use your personage for target practice. hmmm...i would like to think so, i certainly would, but it sounds like a karmic boobie prize to me.

so that happened.

***

hey, has anyone ever made chinese new years' resolutions?

i thought of a bad joke. that even if you did make a chinese new years' resolution, you'd just want to make one again in an hour. i told you it was bad! it's the tweety poopy talking. it has worked its way into my cranium and made me a birdbrain.

***

did you guys ever see the movie "bottle rocket"? it's by the same writer/director of "rushmore." actually, both were co-written by owen wilson who also stars in "bottle rocket." anyway, i just saw it the other night and it is freakin' damn funny. ok, quirky and understated humor, no doubt. even more quirky and subtle than "rushmore." i'd give it two thumbs up, for real.

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romance and hope awaits you at girlboy. today it's megan's turn to share...

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