2000-07-10 | 02:44:50

getting picked for teams on the playground.

getting picked for couples' skate.

getting picked for a date.

getting picked for a job.

feeling the rush of being chosen.

feeling the crush of being rejected.

getting picked for a family?

rush and crush times eight million.

tonight's "edition" of "60 minutes" featured a story on kids who aren't getting adopted.

a couple of times a year, the kids are trotted out in "adoption picnics" where potential parents window shop for potential adoptees. the kids who are old enough to know what's up put on their best behavior and try to be charming--down to their hair accessories. auditioning for what could be the part of a lifetime...to be cast as a welcome member of a hopefully loving family.

the child shoppers talk to the kids and see if they feel there is a match. some write down the names of the kids they want to find out more about. some check the kids for preferred eye color or question their politeness as a suspected facade.

the parents are warned not to say the "a" word and are told that these kids have personality issues due to being abandoned and passed between foster homes. um, duh.

one family adopted two brothers and then "returned" the boys because the "parents" weren't "bonding" with the eleven-year-old "son." you return a sweater that doesn't fit right--not a kid.

two teen girls being interviewed described the sadness of leaving picnic after picnic without winning the favor of a family. when mike wallace asked what they would tell a broken-hearted kid who wanted to quit going to the cattle calls, they said, "don't give up. there's always hope." one of the girls was in her late teens...almost ready to be released from the foster care program into solo adulthood.

i can't imagine the heartache. i can't bear the thought. how can they leave the system without a chip the size of mount everest on their shoulders? more amazing, how can they make it through each day?

sorry to bring the room down, but i can't get those teenagers' "i'm not hurt. i'm ok." faces out of my mind.

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